heard on the wire

Day 25 — a song that makes me laugh

Asparagus

Never has a choice been so easy and yet so difficult.

Easy, because day 25 was always going to be owned by Half Man Half Biscuit and the genius of songwriter Nigel Blackwell.

Difficult, because listening to any HMHB LP will result in several laugh-out-loud moments, knowing chuckles and admiring smiles.

Take, for example, these lines from When the Evening Sun Goes Down:

I like to shout obscenities at steeples
Some people label me a madman
I’m off to see the Bootleg Beatles
As the bootleg Mark Chapman

Or this:

Was it you who invented the school run
At the Laboratoires Garnier, Gaul?
And is it you who’s to stone for the motorway cone
Barry Venison and Davina McCall?

But both are eclipsed by Blackwell’s homage to schoolyard magnets and the dangers of road-side signs.

“This-a-way For New Potatoes”
An arrow points innocently
Dirt track to a darker place
That’s what it says to me
“Last Chance For Hanging Baskets”
They’re even giving you clues!
“Fresh Broad Beans and Aubergines”
Euphemisms, Audrey, euphemisms!

Half Man Half Biscuit :: Asparagus Next Left

Audio MP3


Photo: T-bone; some rights reserved

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